• Me: Dear Diary, It is September first and yet again I'm not on the Hogwarts Express and I'm bitter. What should I do?
  • Diary: Kill Harry Potter.

vast-sea:

the sexual tension between you and anyone your age on public transport 

and suddenly i realised…

denchgang:

…i was my own problematic fave

curvellas:

tumblr made me a much more tolerant and less judgmental person like my cousin be like “omg look at that bitch eyebrows she drew them damn near in her hairline” and i’m like shrug maybe the bitch wanted to have eyebrows in her hairline you don’t know shit about her life.

disneycamera:

I want to major in Walt Disney World for college

cybercitrus:

pixelavender:

adriofthedead:

vicemag:

A quick tip for your elevator ride up to the office: grab a piping hot cuppa joe at the corner store and stick an egg in it to make a hard boiled morning snack.

just stick your hands in boiling hot coffee. go on. do it. just shove your fingers on in that blistering hot cuppa joe. throw an egg in there. who gives a shit. eat your god damn coffee eggs like the stupid slobbering idiot that you are

thIS WHOLE FUCKING ARTICLE





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convert your office into a horrible disaster

cybercitrus:

pixelavender:

adriofthedead:

vicemag:

A quick tip for your elevator ride up to the office: grab a piping hot cuppa joe at the corner store and stick an egg in it to make a hard boiled morning snack.

just stick your hands in boiling hot coffee. go on. do it. just shove your fingers on in that blistering hot cuppa joe. throw an egg in there. who gives a shit. eat your god damn coffee eggs like the stupid slobbering idiot that you are

thIS WHOLE FUCKING ARTICLE

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????????????????????????????

convert your office into a horrible disaster

scottishshortbread:

kmykmykmy:

Gryffindor: I’m a fucking hero.
Slytherin: I’m fucking badass.
Ravenclaw: I’m smart as fuck.
Hufflepuff: My dorm is near the kitchen.

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politicallyincorrectplatypus:

sassykardashian:

sassykardashian:

lets makes the past tense of bang be “bung” instead of “banged”

"we just bung"

Update: I bung him.

grandmaspubes:

frankoceanfanclub:

'Dont I get a hug' most cringeworthy line

Creepy boys’ anthem

when someone calls your name but you don’t know where they are

when someone calls your name but you don’t know where they are

polosweater:

bishopmyles:

guldo:

IM FUCKIN CRYING

LMFAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

brah! lmao

modestmgmtofficial:

everything’s so funny when u use the wrong measurement:

  • 5 gallons of homework
  • mouthful of lint
  • 20 degrees of facial oil
  • 7 pints of china
  • handful of fergi
  • 60 mph of dad

ohmalley-thealliecat:

sam-winchester-cries-during-sex:

lunar-bunnie:

my

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don’t want 

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unless you’ve got

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my snake don’t want habit unless you’ve got rabbits mulan protagonist

That’s the antagonists you moron

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T H E M E